STD Certs & info

[planeterotica]

Some of you will recall a while back i posted details of the indigo clinic in London, well i have had several people email me for details about getting certs so i will post again. The indigo clinic which is for people who work within the adult industry and is held on thursdays at the Charing Cross Hospital so called but is now in Fulham at Fulham Palace Road W6 8RF you need to make an appointment at least a week in advance by phoning 020 8846 1579 well that is the details but if you would like to read on i will bore you with the procedures for a male, females would obviously be slightly different

Once given your appointment which will probably be at a time before the clinic actualy opens you will find yourself standing in a long corridor with other people of all sexes male, female and others, now being that this is an std clinic the gorgeous bird that you just followed down fulham palace road and wanted to fuck the arse off you are now keeping at arms length just in case, the doors are opened and you register at reception and told to go to a waiting area where you sit with all the others who are their for whatever reasons, no conversation is made except maybe for a middle aged old git who rants on about the weather if this happens just say hello Graham and i will acknowledge you. After some time you will be summoned into a room where your full name is called out aloud (embarrasment) by a doctor hopefully a female unless you are a poof who will instuct you to drop your cacks as she is pulling on her rubber gloves, then if she is good at her job she will take a crouching position in front of you whilst weighing your balls with her hands and giving your cock a good looking over, at the same time she is trying not to laugh, you of course are trying to push your manhood into her face, erections are not allowed(chance would be a fine thing) and all this on the NHS who said our money is being wasted. Once that is over with you then go back to the waiting area and called in to see a sexual adviser normally an attractive young lady who will ask you intimate questions about your sex life and she may also give you a few tips, again hardons are not allowed, you then go back to the waiting area where a qualified nurse will take you into a room and take a blood sample from your arm and swabs from your mouth and throat, now comes the bit you are waiting for the nurse then instructs you to get your nudger out and hold the eye open where she takes swabs from inside, one of which goes quite deep and is not so pleasurable, you then go back again to the waiting area while the nurse looks at your swabs under a microscope she can then tell you hopefully the good news but you will still have to wait a week for the certs, so that is the procedure for the males if any of you girls would like to enlighten us with your experiences at a clinic im sure it would make more interesting reading than the bollocks above!love!

Http://www.planet-erotica.org>

[planeterotica]

I forgot to mention that the clinic at Charing Cross Hospital also operates on other days of the week you only need the indigo clinic if you require a certificate not if you just want a check up, i have also been on a tuesday and they have still given me a cert.

[Karl Kruz]

"one of which goes quite deep and is not so pleasurable"....understatement

[planeterotica]

So you have been there then Karl, its probably more pleasurable for the girls having things inserted.!love!

[Beth Sutherland]

I'm not so sure! First you gag on that damn swab down your throat, next you get the 'pleasure' of lying on your back with legs akimbo in the air, some horrid cold stainless steel 'penis' type thing is inserted, strectched wwwwwwiiiiiiiddddddddddeeeee open, they have a good long stare at your tonsils via your womb, try to stick a cotton bud up into ur abdomen, then one up as if they're trying to get it into your bladder, thats not so enjoyable, and finally, well other than having blood taken, they stick one more swab for good luck up your arse!

[planeterotica]

it does sound a bit painfull Beth, i have never had the swab up the arse!sad!

[planeterotica]

Chloe it cost nothing at the Charing Cross hospital but thats not much use to you living in the North East unless you are visiting London.

[EMPREX]

do you have to pay for these certs?

EMPEROR

[Beth Sutherland]

I don't pay for tests, just ?10 for the actual certificate. No use to chloe in Durham, but i go to guildford NHS GUM Clinic