Shanghai Shag

[Officer Dibble]

Some of my geezer pals have recently retuned from a business trip to China, taking in Hong Kong, Guangdong and Shanghai. Apparently, they had been invited over there by their Chinese counterpart ?geezers? who had some very interesting Anglo/Sino trading propositions to put forward.

Upon their return one of the travellers tales my pals regaled me with was regarding the time they were in a nightclub in Shanghai ? in a private part of the club where they were being entertained by these influential Chinese chaps and their ?organisation?. My pal later said it was just like being in a ?Bond movie? or ?Enter the Dragon?. The business of the evening being concluded the head honcho ? a Dr. No/Mr Han type ? clicks his fingers and a dozen of the most stunningly beautiful Suzie Wong sorts ? all attired in those deliciously decadent pre-Mao tight silk dresses, parade into the room and ?Mr Han? bids my honoured pals choose a girl. Well, being sensitive to the diplomat niceties of the situation, and not wanting to create an international incident by having some of the girls feel rejected, one pal calls out ?Wheyhey! I?ll take the whole fucking lot!?

Anyhow, a great time was had by all. Hands were shook, deals were done, and copious quantities of Peking duck were consumed. Oh, and how did my pals get on with the beautiful Suzie Wongs? Well, apparently no one managed to get through the whole retinue in a single evening - but they were there for a week. Wheyhey!


Officer Dibble

[planeterotica]

So they would be down to the local GU clinic now would they just for a check up.

[Officer Dibble]

Well, actually, they anticipated this kind of deal going down and had the foresight to pack ample British Standards Institute spec protection Consequently, the job was ?a good ?un?.



Officer Dibble

[Boutros Ghali]

are there chavs in china ?

[Officer Dibble]

No. The Chinese government take a dim view of chavery - unlike our indulgent western governments. Also, the Chinese people are of a different character to contemporary Brits - The Chinese are more honourable, diligent, industrious and conscientious. They are far less inclined towards the moronic vacuous yobbery that has been allowed to become an acceptable part of British culture and our social landscape.


Officer Dibble

[mart]

You are, of course, as ever, right. I suspect the Chinese execute chavs, along with all the other wrongdoers.
No, I exaggerate. They are "employed" at minimum wage making all those hideous clothes that your favourite members of British society wear.

Mart