Spaffer Johnson's Government

[spider]

Number of tests Johnson promised would be turned round in 24 hours by June: 100%

Tests being turned around in 24 hours: 15.1%

Cost: ?12bn

CONCLUSION: World-beating


Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Spaffer Johnson's Tories: "we don't want a deal with the EU if it bans us from giving state aid to companies owned by our billionaire friends"

Also Spaffer Johnson's Tories: "giving state aid to poor families who can't afford food for their starving children is state aid gone mad! The market knows best!"


Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

?20m to feed starving kids is 0.17% of the ?12bn spent on the failed Test & Trace.

It?s half a garden bridge.

0.02% of the ?100bn for Moonshot.

And that?s the hill this government decide to die on.




Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Dido Harding, latest:

Close contacts reached: 46%

Test results within 24 hours: 15.1%

Tests lost: 16,000 in one go

Cost: ?12bn

Impact on virus control: virtually none

CONCLUSION:
Promote her to head up everything




Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Remember, government's role is not to fund the NHS.

It's to give a knighthood to a 99-year old who raises ?39m for it.

Not to feed hungry kids.

It's to give an MBE to the 22 year old who does.

Not to have a functioning Test & Trace.

It's to give billions to their pals for it



Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Spaffer Johnson says no child will go hungry over Xmas

- Same guy who said he had an oven ready deal

- A plan for social care

- Covid would be gone in 12 weeks

- Test and Trace would be world beating

- 100% of tests would turn around in 24hrs

- No Irish border...

Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Brexit latest

DOWNSIDES
Job losses
End of manufacturing
Worker/environmental rights gone
Chlorinated chicken
NI peace threatened
?7bn in red tape
Security weakened
2-day queues at Dover
?200bn cost

UPSIDE
Soy sauce may cost the same

CONCLUSION
Worth it

Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Brexit latest

DOWNSIDES
Job losses
End of manufacturing
Worker/environmental rights gone
Chlorinated chicken
NI peace threatened
?7bn in red tape
Security weakened
2-day queues at Dover
?200bn cost

UPSIDE
Soy sauce may cost the same

CONCLUSION
Worth it

Another day, another fuck up

[spider]

Brexit latest

DOWNSIDES
Job losses
End of manufacturing
Worker/environmental rights gone
Chlorinated chicken
NI peace threatened
?7bn in red tape
Security weakened
2-day queues at Dover
?200bn cost

UPSIDE
Soy sauce may cost the same

CONCLUSION
Worth it

Another day, another fuck up