Gilty, Gilty Gilty - THe Words of Chairman DJ

[David Johnson]

Well Comrades, such as Comrade Flat Eric or soon to be comrades, once one of my local youth cadres has visited your gaffs, today I would like to talk about government gilts.

Exciting stuff, I can tell you are putting your freely acquired porn downloaded from the web to one side to pay attention.

So as I sit here cross-legged in red robes in Blackpool GHQ tended to by nubile, brainwashed assistants, I will begin.

Now Diamond Dave and Boy George have been banging on for over 2 years now about how fantastic it is that the yield on UK 10 year gilts is only 1.7% per year. For those who need a quick explanation - a gilt is a bond issued by a government for a period e.g. 10 years which provides a yield (annual rate of interest) payable by the government to the buyer e.g. corporate pension funds etc etc.

So at the moment the UK government can raise money by flogging bonds on which they have to pay the buyer a very low interest rate. So this is a good way for the UK government to raise money. Compare this with 10 year Greek gilts which the Greek government would have to give you a really big annual interest rate e.g. 20%.

Now Diamond Dave and Boy George give the reason for the gilt yields being so low in the UK as their fantastic economic management.

Now obviously it is fair to say that :

1. One reason why gilt yields are lower than other countries because investors think they are much likelier to get their dosh back from the UK than Greece so they do not demad a high return. This is the explanation Dave and Boy George have decided to take every single time.

2. THe second reason that UK funds sometimes buy UK gilts is because the UK FTSE is fucked. In other words because the finance guys regard the UK economy as screwed they are not expecting any particular rises in the UK stock market on the back of a complete absence of growth so they decide they may as well put their money into UK gilts. At least they will get something back for their dosh.

Now comrades, the question is who do we believe. Do we believe that gilts have a low yield because Ozzy Osborne is brilliant? Or do we believe it is because the economy is screwed and isnt healing as Cameroon says it is?

Well you know which one I believe but I can hear you saying, yes Chairman DJ, but you are Marxist, Maoist, Fascist dictator type trying to subvert us with your brainwashing.

But no, who agrees with me? Well if it isn't Mark Garnier?

Who is Mark Garnier you ask? Well, actually Mark Garnier is a Tory MP who sits on the Treasury Select Committee and was an Investment Fund Manager before he became an MP in 2010 and he stated last night at a fringe event that "the UK had low borrowing rates because the economy was absolutely screwed".

An honest politician award from Chairman DJ is winging its way to Mark as we speak. What a bloke eh?

http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/6f8253ea-122a ... z28vOaZ4rb

[Rumpleforeskin]

But we already knew labour fucked up the economy so badly there's nothing anyone can do about it.

[David Johnson]

But borrowing is up. They have only reduced the deficit by 2%. Hundreds of thousands out of work and now you are telling me Ozzy and Cameroon have been telling lies for the past 2 years about their fantastic management.

They must be COmmies too eh?

Goodnite!

[Rumpleforeskin]

And as the Irishman said - "I wouldn't start from here if I was you"