The Daily Mail at its most bitter & twisted!

[belfast_birty]

Jim.You need to read a better newspaper!

[jimslip]

My local coffee shop keeps the Daily Mail, but I've noticed that all the papers have their own sneaky agenda that reflects the aims and ambitions of their crazed, megalomaniac proprietors. One of the worst is the Sunday Times, typically Murdoch owned, which constantly hammers the Yuppie high five, "Nothing going to stop us gittin' ahead!" message. It is they that gleefully publish the "Rich List" basically a roll call of the most crooked and corrupt in the UK, that their readers are supposed to genuflect to.They also love promoting the idea that there are those in society who are always one step ahead of YOU! So during the credit crunch they'd have an article with a pic of a perfect family and the story, "How the credit crunch busters are snapping up chateaux's in France and making a killing!"...............and you're a sad cunt for missing out!

[RoddersUK]

It aint that good Jim.
It's a rotten rag for rotten people.
But what's wrong with blaming the last Labour bunch of twatts for anything?

[jimslip]

As you know, I'm always ready to blame New Labour for everything, but central heating boilers? That's a new one to add to the already bursting arsenal of accusations to be laid at the door of New Labour!

So DJ, what have you got to say about the New Labour - "Central Heating Boiler-Gate scandal?" !wink!

[David Johnson]

I have it on very good authority that John "Two Pies" Prescott or Lord Baxi as he is now known, received a secret delivery of Ginsters assorted savouries in return for his nefarious deeds with regard to condensing boilers.

Thank God the brave, fearless Daily Mail has found him out!

I look forward to further revelations such as:

Labour government cutbacks on CO2 emissions causes Uk snow chaos!!!!
Depression caused by Gordon Brown's global recession results in hugh upswing in violent crime cases!!!!!
Uk now in a worse financial position than my Greek auntie in Cleethorpes!!!!
"Peter Mandelsen raped me" claims Ulrika!!!

Can't wait.


Cheers
D

[electric454]

b

[jimslip]

I put it to you DJ that the "Great Central Heating Boiler-Gate" scandal was little more than a cynical attempt by New Labour to commit an act of, genocide by stealth, on the hard working, Tory boiler owners of Britain. John Prescott, by introducing a small but fatal design flaw into the exhaust gas outlet on the boilers, created a so called, "Perfect storm" whereby freezing conditions would cause the pipe to freeze and lethal CO would seep into Tory voters' houses and kill them! In short ensuring victory for New Labour for ever!!

How could Prescott have known that this measure would only kill Tories? Simple, he'd already guessed that only Tories had the financial resources to replace their normal boilers with the fatally flawed, "New Prescott Condenser Boiler"!

I demand the arrest of New Labour and John Prescott for Crimes against humanity!!!

[David Johnson]

You got me bang to rights there, Jim.

However in return for being let off with a warning there are another couple of New Labour death plots I can reveal. PS I am currently in negotiation with the Mail re. spilling the beans on these exclusives.

1. Remember all of those car recalls earlier in the year with brake problems? Thought it was just a coincidence that they were all high-end models !wink!. Unfortunately PH's BMW was too low rent to be included, but it is very difficult to differentiate the poor working class Tories and target them!

2. In the last 4 weeks a bunch of kamikaze Labour supporters infected with swine flu have been touring the golf clubs, Rotary Clubs and Woman's Institutes of the south east, sneezing wherever they go.

If you want to know who it is in 2. above, look for people with tweed jackets with leather patches, discussing putting Clause 4 back into the constitution.

Cheers
D

[jimslip]

You're fucking right! The Toyota brake recall was just before the election!Spooky!

[RoddersUK]

That justifies my antipathy towards Jap cars and why I am happy to own Mercedes cars. I may not be fond of the Jack booted Goosestepping twatts, but they do make good cars.