Best Man speech

[texaspete]

Now then,

I am best man in two weeks time, and I am looking for:

a) a blinding ice breaker

and b) any relevant/topical gags I can slip in. Some about Keegan and Gary Glitter would be much appreciated.

Cheers
Tex

[andytaylor]

Gary Glitter has a date for his release.

She's 8, but in make-up she looks 12.

[colonel]

" I was at a barbecue near Oswestry the other week.

It went like a house on fire, but the Fosters went at 4am"

[Bob Singleton]

Gary Glitter's booked a family holiday in Florida... he's going to Tampa with the kids!


Gary Glitter bought 20 cases of Glenfiddich the other day... apparently he was told it was a cheeky 12 year old that went down well.

There are no jokes ABOUT Kevin Keegan... he IS a joke!

[Guilbert]

>and b) any relevant/topical gags I can slip in. Some about Keegan and Gary Glitter would be much appreciated.


While these may go down Ok at the stag do not sure they are right for the wedding day.

Considering there will be people there of all ages, children up to old aged pensioners, you need to keep the "jokes" fairly safe.

Search the web for best man speeches, there are bouund to be loads of sites.

[texaspete]

I know what you mean...I want to sail close to the win but not be too offensive, its a very delicate balancing act.

[The Last Word]

Stand up and say "My my, you're all looking very smart today."

"I thought they weren't giving out one-off fuel payments."

[colonel]

Tell them The Aristocrats.

[steve56]

His singing was a joke[Keegan]

[Shopgirl]

I have to say I agree with Guilbert, these jokes would be totally inappropriate at a wedding, sorry to be a killjoy, but ok for the stag do, but a definite no-no for the wedding, try sites like www.thebestmanspeech.com this is a great site for help with these types of speeches, I've used it before and it works well.

Good Luck.