Why I don't buy UK Porn...

[lukeolson]

I had a bunch of DVD's delivered this week, there was some UK Student House, Real Couples, Johnny Rebel, John Mason, Relish, Pete le meat and some Poppy Morgan etc...

I haven't watched that much UK produced porn previously but after watching this batch I don't think I've missed out on much. I just don't understand for the most part why Brits don't know how to make good pornography. I'm not singling anyone in particular but it was all frustrating to watch.

First of all, value for money is dire. Virtually every DVD I put in had the same half arsed DVD authoring, no extras whatsoever. For examle, UK Student House has 4 scenes, and a bunch of trailers for phone sex and 20 year old legend movies, thats it! Comparing that to a DVD from the states or europe it's just a joke. I don't see how cost can be an issue to include some stills or some outakes? There's no excuse for a lazy product.

One of the things that annoyed me most was the camera angles and lighting, half the time the camera is either too close or too far away or some other awkward angle and this seemed constant throughout everything I watched. When you see the camera work from countless US producers(Mike John, Jules Jordan, Jim Powers) it's not hard to see that the UK still doesn't know how to shoot properly.

Another thing I don't understand on the mandatory inclusion of awkward dialogue. It's everywhere! I don't quite understand the point of it, all these movies would be considered gonzo movies, mostly, so why there's need for all this pointless jibber jibba I find strange. Maybe it's done to give it character? Watching a scene from UK Student House, Lee Henshaw never shuts up talking dirty during a scene. It was distracting!

Seeing girls like Alicia Rhodes, Angel Long & McKenzie Lee in UK produced movies and then comparing their performances to the ones they've given in the US is like comparing night and day. Not sure it's the girls themselves, the studs or the directors? but it must be something that makes them turn it down it a notch or four.

The thing that I found most constrasting however is the action, it's just tame. I watched a David Perry movie right after I'd watched this lot and on all counts it just blows it apart.

I'm a potential buyer of UK pornography and I simply don't for the reasons above. I realise some people may like it for just those reasons but I don't agree.

[Impish]

I have to disagree, I find UK porn (on the whole) much better than US Stuff. It may not compare on a production level (imho that is not too important anyway) but the girls and the scenes are million time better than the American bollocks out there.
I guess it comes down to personal preference.

[nachovx]

I agree with your views. I think the attitude is just any old rubbish sells because it's porn. Also because of restrictive distribution and strange R18 rules, they work in a protected environment to an extent - no real competition and no incentive to get better. None of the large US companies want to produce here because the laws are too restrictive.The whole industry revolves around the page 3, get yer tits out, girl next door types. The girls want to do as little as possible for the biggest fee at home, but once the bright lights beckon and they have to compete with professionals in the US, they pull the stops out. It's hardly going to change over here, it's more of a cottage industry than anything else and a handy shop for US companies to scout for new talent.

The market seems to tick along with a few die hard fans who genuinely like the product, a constant trickle of new consumers to replace the disillusioned and those who just don't have anything to compare it against or settle for what they can get.

I'd not looked at the British Industry for nearly 20 years until about a year ago ... I don't think much changed over those years by the quality of the product. Maybe insiders see something we don't ... or maybe they can't see what we think is so glaringly wrong or bad. Either way, I just keep an eye on the British side of things just to see where it's going ... but where that is doesn't bother me too much.

Given a level playing field with US/Euro producers and no restrictions as to what could be made or supplied, I think the UK industry would be largely wiped out. What there is only continues if they all abide by the rules of the house game and keep outsiders as outsiders

[one eyed jack]

Hi Luke,
I would welcome your views on Real Couples. I don't take offence to your comments at all because you validated them with reasons. I havent had any negative feed back on Real Couples and would like to hear what you have to say about it...

I also think your opinion would be welcomed at forum where it will be placed at the doorstep of ...well UK adult producers.

Some of us deserve to get our knuckles rapped from time to time...after all, don't we make our product for the consumer? Like you?

[DanG]

First things first Luke, there's a very good reason why UK produced DVD's aren't bursting at the seams with extras like their US counterparts...it's called the BBFC. For every behind the scenes segment, outtake, blooper, still image, or 'Easter Egg' hidden scene, they charge a per minute rate to watch and 'classify' it.

Now, if a producer really wanted to go to town on extras over here, they could easily end up paying between 2-3 times more than they would for just having the feature itself certified. Factor in the ridiculous restrictions UK producers have to contend with to get their product into the hands of the punter, and the margins they have to work with, and suddenly an extra two or three grand on certification becomes the difference between profit, breaking even, or being left seriously out of pocket.

US producers have no such obligation or added cost to consider, hence they can stuff their DVD's to the brim.

As for your more artistic concerns...well, one man's wine is another man's poison. There are a crop of producers over here who are trying to break the mold a little (Wankstar, Doll Theatre, Nectas, Relish etc,), but it's not going to happen overnight. If you look at the AVN award nominations, you'll see us Brits are pretty well nominated for work shot both at home and abroad...including Poppy Morgan and Terry Stephen's 'Real Couples', so you're obviously a little out of sync with mainstream opinion on this matter, I feel.

As it stands, there's a very good chance that McKenzie Lee will be crowned best new starlet if she can beat off the likes of Courtney Cummz and Hillary Scott, Roxy Jezel is up for a shedload of awards, and Alicia Rhodes, Michelle B, Ashley Long et al are all well represented. 'Masks: The Light and The Dark' from Rude Britania is nominated, Suze Randall has a couple of titles in the running (I still count her as a Brit!), and we even have Joana Jet keeping the British end up in the Transexual category!!!

Most notably, Tanya Hyde's 'Cabaret Bizarre' is up for a raftload (indeed, one of Alicia Rhodes nominations is for her performance in this film), including a bunch of technical ones like Best Editing, Best Videography, and Best Music. Tellingly, it is also up for a couple of Best Foreign categories, proving that we CAN shoot some hot, high quality stuff over here when we put our minds to it! Perhaps you ought to give that movie a try? It's definitely different from what you've previously been watching!

Speaking of which, surely this means that Tanya Hyde now replaces Anna Span as Britain's #1 female porn director? *wink*

[lukeolson]

one eyed jack wrote:

> Hi Luke,
> I would welcome your views on Real Couples.

Hi OEJ, I actually thought the Real Couples 2 DVD I got was the best of the bunch, and I'm not just saying that because you asked. I guess it had an honesty and grit about it I liked.

The angles an lighting on Angie Georges scene got kinda bad a few times, and I thought this of alot of the movies I watched, the fact that the scene had anal but really only 2 positions, that's not enough in my opinion. Almost like anal was an after thought. Michelle Thorne's scene was good, however I really dislike filming the cumshot from so far away, I mean, if you take a screen shot of the cumshot. A 1/3 of the screen on the right is basically of the floor and the guys legs. If I were shooting, and I'm not. I would probably cut before the cumshot so I could get into position to frame the money shot better, but maybe that's not appropriate with a movie with "real" in the title

Oh, and a pet hate of mine, this applies too all these DVD's. Please split the scenes up into smaller chapters!! The good thing about DVD is you can jump straight into a section without fast forwarding. However, when DVD's only have 1 chapter per scene it's just a little better than VHS.

regards

[lukeolson]

DanG wrote:

> First things first Luke, there's a very good reason why UK
> produced DVD's aren't bursting at the seams with extras like
> their US counterparts...it's called the BBFC. For every behind
> the scenes segment, outtake, blooper, still image, or 'Easter
> Egg' hidden scene, they charge a per minute rate to watch and
> 'classify' it.

Doesn't that apply to every DVD sold in the UK? And consumers don't know about it.

They simply see 4 scenes, no extras compared to stuff they can buy from the US, 6 scenes, BTS, bonus scenes, trailers, filmographies, biographies, photo galleries. It's not hard to see why people choose the US product.

[Darren Morgan]

Hi,

I agree with terry, I too would also like to hear your comments as you mentioned Poppy Morgan, I take it you did mean Poppy Morgan Productions ? and not Poppy herself, as this would be a different matter. Poppy does not direct or produce movies at present, she concentrates on performing.

I still have my "L" plates on with regards to producing/directing and welcome constructive critisism so i can improve and move forward in the industry, The new forum at www.ukadultproducers.com will allow producers and people like yourself to share opinions/ideas that will go a long way to improve our industry.

[DanG]

Tell me about it...there are plenty of mainstream DVD's where the US version has heaps more additional features than the UK version. The 'pinch' is felt much more so at the non-blockbuster end of the market. The US DVD of Kevin Smith's 'Mallrats' has a couple of hours of extras on it. The UK version has scene selection...whoopee!

With adult producers, who aren't shifting 'Revenge Of The Sith' type numbers, that extra few grand expenditure can't be absorbed quite so readily as it would be at Universal or 20th Century Fox.

In artistic terms though, yes, there are a lot of UK producers who could do with stepping their game up a bit, but whether to attribute this to an unwillingness to improve or simply being hamstrung by the restrictions they are forced to work under, I don't know. If producers could legally sell their products via mail/the net, and get the retail price for it as opposed to the wholesale, I'd dare say they'd have a little bit of extra cash to invest in better equipment/crew/performers/location/production etc. I think it would be beneficial all round...wonder why AITA are against it?

[one eyed jack]

Thanks for your comments Luke. I do see your point...On the subject of extras, I have loads on the One Eyed Jack series available from Your Choice too much in fact that we had to drop near enough half of it. If I was authoring my UK titles I would be more generous with the scene selections but the fact is, the costing in the UK doesnt mean you are going to recoup that in sales, furthermore, you don't sell anymore units (or less for that matter) as people have a take it or leave it attitude to this...

It is very hard to out do the americans on two fronts alone. They have a much bigger market and the dollar against the pound means they get almost twice as much. You can buy a brand new dvd for $20 which is nearly 10 quid but 20 quid is $40. The americans would splutter on their cups of coffee than pay that price. I know of one big US company selling wholesale $2 per unit. Britain couldnt sell for a pound a pop. You might as well be a charity for giving the stuff away

I've seen some extras that could be considered dire but its an extra nonetheless. Some bonus scenes wouldnt go amiss though. I'd think they would be favourable and outtakes and pics too but who really bothers looking at stills when you can freeze frame a dvd just as good these days?

Still, you made some valid points though. Thanks for taking the time to explain also. Your opinion is valued.