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Something I've wondered for years: why is UK porn always 50% comedy? Obviously the tits-and-bums tradition means there's gonna be some of that Benny Hill stuff in our porn, but one reason I've never bothered subscribing to any of the cable channels (apart from my dick's near-total immunity to softcore) is the way virtually all the shows are supposed to be funny. Am I the only one who doesn't feel like laughing when I'm watching sex? Those two blokes going around in the bus, "Shagnasty & Muttley", even Ben Dover on a bad day - so often it comes out like a hardcore "Confessions Of A Driving Instructor". The sex is almost always better than the wooden/tranced-out performances on films from Private/Vivid/etc., why can't it stand on its own?Sure, low budgets and lack of acting pretensions don't make for American-style glossy shit, but I don't want that anyway, just decent looking people shagging. Is it just me, or is the way even the best British porn is filmed like pantomime starting to grate a bit?

bloody hell, i agree with every single word of this. don't tell me i'm sleep posting again?

i wrote to tvx and tac a while back asking them, among other things, to knock all the pantomime crap on the head but to no avail, as anyone who's had to endure emma gault's performance on 'labia - warrior princess', can testify!

agree totally about the nature of private vids, etc, as well! just been looking another one today. some of the women are gorgeous in that c-list supermodel, overly made up way they specialize in. it sent me to sleep though (maybe that's when i made your post otis!)

The reason that British porn has so much humour in it is because normal sex has so much humour in it. Obviously our American and European counterparts don't agree (serious idiots), they think that sex happens in a total humour vacuum. Why must everyone be so serious all the time?

I mean sex is about fun, to me watching some gonzo sadist trying to suffocate a hungarian girl isn't very erotic and only marginally funny.(I'm being ironic by the way). Thankfully, we've grown up in a tradition of humour and story telling and as a nation, we can laugh at ourselves.

And at the end of the day, when it comes to filming, sex is sex. Sure you can throw in triple anals or whatever, but what makes a sex scene watchable? Ooh, I'm getting scary now, what makes a scene erotic? Why does one porno give you a whopping great stiffy and others leave you cold?

Personally speaking, everytime I have sex with a girl they always laugh when I take of my pants. So sex must be funny. (I'm being ironic again...I think).

The reason their is sex and humour is simple really. It is easier to get throught the censor with humour in it hence Carry on, Conffessions etc etc. I filmed loads of the humour for TVX Crown Chronicles, Lifestles of the Rich & Perverted etc. You can get past the ITC ehn there is a funny element. Fuck Truck is quite funny I think where the girls take the piss out of the crew who are supposed to be sad(well they are).
I am looking for new crew members for a new series,

Phil "Coco" McCavity.

Couldn't agree with you more. I know sex is fun and there are funny bits in it and stuff but it just doesn't work on screen. I can't watch the Dr. Neil Down stuff, cos they're trying to do funny, and they just can't do it. The point is, funny on British porn channels at the moment seems to equate to a bloke or couple of blokes trying to be one of the lads.

I don't know about you, but when I'm watching porn, the bloke is useful because he provides the dick. I don't want to hear him, see him, listen to his less then able attempt at being funny or anything else really.

Trouble is, the blokes tend to be the ones directing, producing and distributing so they have a certain amount of flexibility in putting themsleves in front of the camera.

I appreciate the point about the censors, though, even though I think when it comes to porn they're looking more about raw acts and what can be seen rather then about style or comedic value.

Another difficulty is about catering to all viewers. Couples wont want to watch the same stuff single people will want to, especially the raincoat brigade of which I am dangerously close to becoming a part of

I guess the answer is, if you have a better idea, let's hear it.

I agree wholeheartedly.

Sure the men are needed in porn films but do we really need to concentrate so much of the filming on them and their often inane banter.

And as for close ups of their faces when cumming - please no, it's a complete turn off and worse than unecessary.

The best adult films I've ever seen are the Rod Powers American ones, Dirty Debuttantes, etc. he always concentrates on what we want to see - beautiful women.

I believe that a lot of the time the reason why they cut to a face shot just before the man cums is because he's not 'ready' and they have to 'cut' until he is.