New Jobs announced

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David Johnson
Posts: 7844
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

New Jobs announced

Post by David Johnson »

I've just got off the blower from the Prime Minister's office and there are two new jobs available at Westminster.

Job No. 1

Eton-educated, Oxford graduate who really enjoyed wandering round Oxford smashing up restaurants and pubs with aristocratic Bullingdon club and is now a millionaire entirely due to his father's efforts requires Communications Director.

Key requirement for the job is that the Director must have a deep understanding of oiks and chavs who read papers like the Sun. Must be able to describe who they are, what they want etc so that potential employer can lie to them effectively.

Job No. 2

St. Pauls school educated, Oxford graduate who really enjoyed wandering round Oxford smashing up restaurants and pubs with aristocratic Bullingdon club and is now a millionaire entirely due to his father's efforts, requires Economics Tutor.

Key requirement for the job is to provide a crash course in economics. Youth unemployment has hit an all-time high. December sales in the High Street were the worst ever. The biggest jump in the consumer price index recently recorded. Sluggish growth in the economy.

Must be able to provide ideas so that horrid Shadow Chancellor who is energetic, aggressive, smart and knows lots about economics doesn't make me cry for Daddy.


Cheers
D
David Johnson
Posts: 7844
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Extra requirement

Post by David Johnson »

Cameron's added a couple of extra requirements for the Communications Director.

Must be able to convince thickos that everything that goes wrong is down to the Labour government.

Must be able to convince thickos that the word "global" as in the global recession, means "Gordon Brown"

Cheers
D
Dave Wells
Posts: 2714
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: New Jobs announced

Post by Dave Wells »

Damn, Shit, Piss, counts me out then !

Dave Wells

http://www.dave-wells.co.uk
Dick Moby
Posts: 922
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: New Jobs announced

Post by Dick Moby »

Keep taking the tablets David.
There's a good lad.
Arginald Valleywater
Posts: 4288
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: New Jobs announced

Post by Arginald Valleywater »

You have a completely balanced personality DJ, a chip on each shoulder. Of course Mr Blair and Mr Darling didn't attend Fettes and Lorretto, two of Scotland's most elite and expensive public schools did they?? In your bleak world having an affluent, succesful family is obviously a heinous crime.
David Johnson
Posts: 7844
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Arginald

Post by David Johnson »

Chip on my shoulder?

Do you not even read your own posts?

http://bgafd.co.uk/forum/read.php?f=3&i=241368&t=241363

So let's summarise. Its okay for you to attack Balls for what you think his family have forked out for in terms of a Harvard education. By the way I put you right here

http://bgafd.co.uk/forum/read.php?f=3&i=241463&t=241363

but any criticism of the Tories is because I have a chip on my shoulder.

Err right!

!wink!

D
David Johnson
Posts: 7844
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: New Jobs announced

Post by David Johnson »

Another outstanding contribution to the forum. You are beginning to show real promise.

Next time, try to string a long sentence together.

Cheers
D
David Johnson
Posts: 7844
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

PH

Post by David Johnson »

Could you perhaps turn your duff psychology onto someone who is always going on about

"my nice house, nice businesses, my nice car, my nice few bob in the bank"

You may be more successful when analysing yourself.

!wink!

Cheers
D
Dick Moby
Posts: 922
Joined: Fri Jul 14, 2017 2:40 am

Re: New Jobs announced

Post by Dick Moby »

I waste enough time reading your bullshit,why spend more?
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