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My wife is going on a hen weekend to Newcastle next weekend (20 - 21) and the kids are at their Nan's so, for the first time in three years, I am left to my own devices!

Does anyone know of anything exciting going on that I can do? Preferably dirty, rude, crude and great fun!

I could always go on the p*ss with my mates but, at 32 I feel I've grown out of that.

Any suggestions would be most welcome.

Cheers all

the reality is mate all you are going to be able to do is with your mates

but that isn't a bad thing, you should see that as a good thing, think about it, when was the last time you were able to go on the full on piss with one or some of your close mates (maybe some of them are single) and just have a full on lads night out

i'm not far from your age (34) and the opportunities for my circle of mates to go on the lash as lads gets less and less

my two penneth worth would be get some of your old mates together and sit in a pub, get lashed and talk about bloke things until you fall over, then if you can still stand wander in the old messy club you used to go to and laff at the kids and say how old you feel!!!

have a good night mate

Ok this is weird coming from a Yank, but have you thought of going to one of those dogging sites & having a look-see? Then you could report to us what happened.

Go on the piss with yer mates vidfan ... works for me - either that or go undercover as a stripper and bill yourself as "Jock the Stunt Cock" ... (doesn't work for me unfortunately very regularly it has to be said apart from the time a couple of years ago when I think the ladies had something in their water (and they were seeing double) but that is a completely different story altogether, the bar manager at the time denied it, though I semi-proofed her wrong in a manner of speaking) ... yeah just go for down the pisser with yer buds mate and skewer any nice looking kebab on yer pole and see if she likes your hot spicy sauce (high in carbohydrates mind)!!
Certainly sounds like better advice than gone Dogging ....

Why not get the old duster, polish and detergent out and go through the house from top to bottom. Do everything - cupboards, shelves, skirting boards, under this, behind that - the lot.

Imagine what a lovely surprise that would be for your wife when she returns home.

Steve R has the best suggestion by far!!
If you have any respect for your wife and children, you won't even consider anything outside boozing with yer mates, or a porno DVD.
Just think of the consequences if you DO come a cropper and Mrs Vidfan gets wind............

Here's a suggest which is sort of on topic. Setup a video shoot.

I tried this a few years ago in a similar situation. I actually setup two in one weekend. One which was meant to be soft core but got a bit hard.

And a second which was hardcore with Anne Marie Dixon. If you look her up on BGAFD you'll see she rarely appears in hardcore, so I was quite pleased with this. I have also taped her appearances on channel 4, to add to the collection.

On both shoots I found both women were really pleasant. If you've ever been to a BGAFD event you'll know what I mean.

I haven't repeated this exercise since, but I have a unqiue souvenir and some pleasant memories.

I can't give you any current links to follow because it was too long ago now. But I suggest you start with the BGAFD links page. It takes some work and preparation but you don't get naught for ought.

You could always take your mates along.

between the choice of cleaning the house top to bottom and doing a vid shoot - i don't know why but I'm leaning towards the latter! A nice solo vid of a girl to view in the privacy of my own home sounds good.

Anybody any good contacts who can help me arrange this?

Cheers