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Thanks for this list Max. I have made a mental note to ask you to advise me on all my forthcoming travel arrangements.

However there is one small problem. If I want a visa to visit India, for example, I fill in a form and apply to the service set up by the Indian High Commission in the UK. If I am an Afghan citizen who does not have diplomatic status I cannot apply for a visa in Afghanistan. The British embassy in Kabul provides no such service.

The only way I can do it is if I as an Afghan citizen travel first to Pakistan or say, India and apply. Obviously at this point I have no idea whether a. I will get a visa b. how long it will take c. I will survive the journey through Afghanistan and Pakistan where the border is a bit of a war zone.

It's not like travelling from London to Liverpool, Max (riposte from Bob Singleton, "oh yes it is").

See what I mean, Max?

"Flying is certainly a lot cheaper and quicker than the people smuggling route. I don't know if you need a visa for a holiday, you might need one to get work, but if they come as 'holiday makers' then claim Asylum as they disembark then that is a way into the UK for them."

Given the interest in adventure holidays, I intend to provide the ultimate wilderness weekend for jaded UK travellers. You fly out to Kabul and come back in a shipping container, Max.

Oh and by the way, if you are Afghan, you need a visa to visit the UK in any capacity. So looks like they will have to give the Ryanair Kabul to Luton flight a miss.

They have no right to be hear to sod off. Oh hang on let's ask for asylum. Seing as they are Sikh why didn't they just travel to India and not the UK? Nearer and a lot cheaper. Oh hang on India might have had the balls to send them back...

David Johnson the contrarian.

Contrarian - someone who takes a different view from other people.

I don't think so. Plenty of people agree with my view. Whether they post on this forum or not is irrelevant.